Favourite Quotes and Quotations

Dave Barry vol 6...

The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas balding white men look like giant thumbs.

The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expedition.

The world is full of strange phenomena that cannot be explained by the laws of logic or science. Dennis Rodman is only one example.

We idolized the Beatles, except for those of us who idolized the Rolling Stones, who in those days still had many of their original teeth.

We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this is how we stay objective.

We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain about it, we have to admit that we know of no better system, except possibly flipping a coin.

What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.

The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot.

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford.

The illegal we do immediately, the unconstitutional takes a little longer.
- Henry Kissinger

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
- Mignon McLaughlin

Time is precious, but truth is more precious than time.
- Benjamin Disraeli

My education was the liberty I had to read indiscriminately and all the time, with my eyes hanging out.
- Dylan Thomas

Adopt the pace of nature, her secret is patience.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

May I forget what ought to be forgotten; and recall, unfailing, all that ought to be recalled, each kindly thing, forgetting what might sting.
- Maty Caroline Davies

Opportunity can benefit no man who has not fitted himself to seize it and use it. Opportunity woos the worthy, shuns the unworthy. Prepare yourself to grasp opportunity, and opportunity is likely to come your way. It is not so fickle, capricious and unreasoning as some complain.
- B. C. Forbes

When you reach for the stars, you may not quite get one, but you won't come up with a handful of mud, either.
- Leo Burnett

War will exist until that distant day when the conscientious objector enjoys the same reputation and prestige that the warrior does today.
- John F. Kennedy

Reason can in general do more than blind force.
- Gallus

Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you're a vegetarian.
- Dennis Wholey

Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles he has overcome trying to succeed.
- Booker T. Washington

Rule No. 1 is, don't sweat the small stuff. Rule No. 2 is, it's all small stuff.
- Robert Eliot

There ain’t no rules around here. We’re trying to accomplish something.
~ Thomas Edison

If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough.
~ Albert Einstein

If I had asked my customers what they wanted, they would have said a faster horse.
~ Henry Ford

The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, but illusion of knowledge.
~ Stephen Hawking

You can accomplish anything you want in life provided you don’t mind who gets the credit.
~ Harry S Truman

Victory has a thousand fathers, but defeat is an orphan.
~ John F. Kennedy

Groucho vol 3...

Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.

Women should be obscene and not heard.

Yes, darling, let me cover your face with kisses, on second thought, just let me cover your face.

You have to get up early if you want to get out of bed.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.

I wish you’d keep my hands to yourself.

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows -- marriage does.

My mother treated us all equally... with contempt.

No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early.

She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.

All that is gold does not glitter
Not all those who wander are lost

Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.
Abraham Lincoln


A bone to the dog is not charity. Charity is the bone shared with the dog, when you are just as hungry as the dog.
Jack London

Douglas Adams vol 1...

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.

He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.

He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher... or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.

I don't believe it. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it.

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.

I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons.

If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.

An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind.
Buddha


Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase.
Martin Luther King, Jr.

The more that you read, the more things you will know.
The more that you learn, the more places you'll go.

Dr. Seuss

Dream big and dare to fail.

James Hetfield