Dear Dad...

[Srbo]

Back in those dark times, times that will never be forgotten, no matter how hard I try…I didn`t worry, dad, that I couldn`t see you for weeks, sometimes even for months.
I knew that, no matter what is happening around you, you still had those same, carrying, deep green eyes…full of Love for all people.

It didn`t make me sad, father, that I could not give you a hug or feel your hand on my shoulder.
I knew that that hand was still strong, like long ago, back then when you were teaching me how to walk and your hand was holding me, watching out for me not to fall.

I didn`t worry that I could hear your voice sometimes only over radio contact…if even that…it still sounded warm and strong, giving me courage…and I knew that You were giving courage and hope to people around you just by talking to them, in that bright voice of yours…

I didn`t worry that your hair grew gray and in some spots even white when I saw that picture that that guy, whatever his name was, God bless him, gave me when he came over to our Stand…I knew that your soul was still young and beautiful, full of light…no matter how dark everything around you was…

I didn`t worry that many of your friends have gone to a better place and that you would be lonely…I knew that you would always find new ones, friends that would love you and you would love them…like back then, in the good old times…

I didn`t worry about you watching our world fall apart and that you were sometimes deep in thoughts…I knew that you would always search for someone who was more worried then you and that you would try to give him strength and courage to go on…

I didn`t worry, dad…because I always believed in you, I believed that the madness is going to end and that some day we would be sitting together again in front of our old house and that our laughter would be heard a few blocks down the street…I believed that we are going to live.

But…you didn`t live.
You died.
They took you away, they took those green eyes, that gentle smile, those carrying hands…they took you away and you never came back.

And what does worry me, daddy…is that I know that you were thinking of me when you died…and I didn`t know you were dying...and that I was not there for you to help you…that I could have done maybe more then just believe that we would be together again…

And that, daddy, will worry me for the rest of my life, even though I know it`s not my fault...or anybodys … the beast was awake for a long time back then and there was nothing we, people, could do about it…except hope that it will go back to sleep...

I just wish you could be here to see your granddaughter..if just for a second…

I don`t like Novembers, daddy…you died on a cold November day…and I will always worry…when November comes…

[Dana Jean]

You made me cry.

[JohnDalglish]

Hi,

Tears here, thankee for sharing that, Srbo.

(((((Srbo)))))))

Long days and pleasant nights

[bopropadop]

Srbo - that is very sad and beautiful. Thank you for sharing. I wish you well during this month and going forward.

[dejolane]

My dad died in 1995. He had only seen 3 of his grandkids (there are 5) And 2 great grandkids,which he will never know. But I know he is looking down from heaven and watching them. I miss him alot.

Debbie

[brownmouse]

So sad. You father sounds like he was a wonderful man, Srbo. He is at peace now and I know is watching his granddaughter with love from above.

[Dana]

((((Srbo)))):down:

[Gwenivere]

((((Srbo))))
I feel the same way when July rolls around. August, Sept, Oct, etc..
You are far from alone and it’s not our fault.

[Sheila Carlyle]

Oh, sweetheart.

[hipmamajen]

Oh Srbo, I'm sending hugs. :(

[Kim L.]

(((((Srbo)))))
Thank you for sharing your hurt and loss with us. I believe your father knows how much you love him.

[Born In Sin]

You have remembered the face of your father! (((Srbo)))

[Eleese of Gilead.]

This has moved me. Thank you for your courage, it must have been hard to write this, I do appreciate what you have shared.

-Eleese

[FlakeNoir]

I bet your dad is proud of you (((Srbo)))... and that he loves his grandbaby-girl. This is such a cliche - (& thanks a lot Titanic) - but, I really do believe that the 'heart does go on'. It's what allows me to go on.

[Spideyman]

I read this earlier today and had to step back with tears in my eyes. My dad passed in 2000. Your tribute is wonderful. May the remainder of this month come with only green lights.

[Agincourt Concierge]

Srbo, thank you for sharing. I too lost my Dad, in 2005. I was Daddy's girl, through and through...thank goodness he got to enjoy his grandsons for a time. Dads leave a really big hole in the heart when they go. :down:

[MadamMack]

Srbo . . .your dad sees his grandbaby and he's very proud of you. I'm proud to know you because you have a beautiful heart.

[aussiewonder]

I dont know what to say, you are not alone.

[BlackEye]

That was beautiful. Your father is proud you told him this, I'm sure of it. Hang in there, many hugs. :)

[dejolane]

When we all lose a love one, she/he will always be in our hearts. :sad: Think of the good times you had with your love ones. Your mother & father were your life.

Debbie

[MrsSmeej]

((((((Srbo))))))

[sheba41]

:sad: that was beautiful....

[Srbo]

Thank you everybody so much on reading this and leaving your comments...

I feel better now that I know I am not alone with that pain...

But...no tears, please...

`Coz...when we are sad...I believe that our loved ones who have past away are sad for us.

I am proud to know you guys, and to be a member of this family.

[poisonbat]

Srbo, I am late in answering this thread for one reason. I am still deeply in the grief process for my grandfather. July 27th will always be ingrained in my memory. The tears did flow when I read your post, I can feel your pain. I have lost all of my grandparents now but still have my parents. I can not imagine the pain of losing them although I know it will happen eventually. Many prayers and blessings are being sent your way from me. :bat:

[Volic]

Thank you for sharing Srbo!

[Nero]

started to read it, couldn't finish. hits too close to home for me.

but from what I saw, very nice and thoughtful and brave post. I'm sorry for what it's worth from someone who is across the internets :(

[Srbo]

Poisonbat, I know how you feel...well, what can I say...keep the memory alive...
Somebody once said that people never die for as long there is somebody to think about them and to love them...

Thank you Volic for reading...

And thanks Nero for the kind words...

[Srbo]

And...if anybody is interested in what happened in ex-Yugoslavia, during the civil War in the 90-ties, and has two hours to spend on it...

Here is a link to a serbian movie called "Pretty Village Pretty Flame" ( it has english subtitles )...a movie about two childhood friends, a Serb and a Muslim...and everything that happened to them...in the war and before it...

It's as close as it gets to what happened over there... so, if you want to...watch it...

http://vinovo.magnify.net/video/Lepa-Brena/theater#theater_title

[Srbo]

Well, on this day you were born...

Don`t know what else to say...

[Haunted]

Back in those dark times, times that will never be forgotten, no matter how hard I try…I didn`t worry, dad, that I couldn`t see you for weeks, sometimes even for months.
I knew that, no matter what is happening around you, you still had those same, carrying, deep green eyes…full of Love for all people.

It didn`t make me sad, father, that I could not give you a hug or feel your hand on my shoulder.
I knew that that hand was still strong, like long ago, back then when you were teaching me how to walk and your hand was holding me, watching out for me not to fall.

I didn`t worry that I could hear your voice sometimes only over radio contact…if even that…it still sounded warm and strong, giving me courage…and I knew that You were giving courage and hope to people around you just by talking to them, in that bright voice of yours…

I didn`t worry that your hair grew gray and in some spots even white when I saw that picture that that guy, whatever his name was, God bless him, gave me when he came over to our Stand…I knew that your soul was still young and beautiful, full of light…no matter how dark everything around you was…

I didn`t worry that many of your friends have gone to a better place and that you would be lonely…I knew that you would always find new ones, friends that would love you and you would love them…like back then, in the good old times…

I didn`t worry about you watching our world fall apart and that you were sometimes deep in thoughts…I knew that you would always search for someone who was more worried then you and that you would try to give him strength and courage to go on…

I didn`t worry, dad…because I always believed in you, I believed that the madness is going to end and that some day we would be sitting together again in front of our old house and that our laughter would be heard a few blocks down the street…I believed that we are going to live.

But…you didn`t live.
You died.
They took you away, they took those green eyes, that gentle smile, those carrying hands…they took you away and you never came back.

And what does worry me, daddy…is that I know that you were thinking of me when you died…and I didn`t know you were dying...and that I was not there for you to help you…that I could have done maybe more then just believe that we would be together again…

And that, daddy, will worry me for the rest of my life, even though I know it`s not my fault...or anybodys … the beast was awake for a long time back then and there was nothing we, people, could do about it…except hope that it will go back to sleep...

I just wish you could be here to see your granddaughter..if just for a second…

I don`t like Novembers, daddy…you died on a cold November day…and I will always worry…when November comes…

God Bless you, Dearest Heart. It hurts, I know. But he will always be with you in your memories. Bless your memories. Biggest of hugs for you.

[Volic]

And...if anybody is interested in what happened in ex-Yugoslavia, during the civil War in the 90-ties, and has two hours to spend on it...

Here is a link to a serbian movie called "Pretty Village Pretty Flame" ( it has english subtitles )...a movie about two childhood friends, a Serb and a Muslim...and everything that happened to them...in the war and before it...

It's as close as it gets to what happened over there... so, if you want to...watch it...

http://vinovo.magnify.net/video/Lepa-Brena/theater#theater_title

Thank you for the link Srbo. :smile2:

[lilredkdn]

That was touching. (((Srbo)))

[Srbo]

Volic..did yu watch the movie ?

Tell me please what do you think...

Haunted, God bless your heart.

Haunted..a very good screen name...or a middle name you night even say...:smile2:

Lil, thank you for reading.

:smile2:

[Jay77]

Back in those dark times, times that will never be forgotten, no matter how hard I try…I didn`t worry, dad, that I couldn`t see you for weeks, sometimes even for months.
I knew that, no matter what is happening around you, you still had those same, carrying, deep green eyes…full of Love for all people.

It didn`t make me sad, father, that I could not give you a hug or feel your hand on my shoulder.
I knew that that hand was still strong, like long ago, back then when you were teaching me how to walk and your hand was holding me, watching out for me not to fall.

I didn`t worry that I could hear your voice sometimes only over radio contact…if even that…it still sounded warm and strong, giving me courage…and I knew that You were giving courage and hope to people around you just by talking to them, in that bright voice of yours…

I didn`t worry that your hair grew gray and in some spots even white when I saw that picture that that guy, whatever his name was, God bless him, gave me when he came over to our Stand…I knew that your soul was still young and beautiful, full of light…no matter how dark everything around you was…

I didn`t worry that many of your friends have gone to a better place and that you would be lonely…I knew that you would always find new ones, friends that would love you and you would love them…like back then, in the good old times…

I didn`t worry about you watching our world fall apart and that you were sometimes deep in thoughts…I knew that you would always search for someone who was more worried then you and that you would try to give him strength and courage to go on…

I didn`t worry, dad…because I always believed in you, I believed that the madness is going to end and that some day we would be sitting together again in front of our old house and that our laughter would be heard a few blocks down the street…I believed that we are going to live.

But…you didn`t live.
You died.
They took you away, they took those green eyes, that gentle smile, those carrying hands…they took you away and you never came back.

And what does worry me, daddy…is that I know that you were thinking of me when you died…and I didn`t know you were dying...and that I was not there for you to help you…that I could have done maybe more then just believe that we would be together again…

And that, daddy, will worry me for the rest of my life, even though I know it`s not my fault...or anybodys … the beast was awake for a long time back then and there was nothing we, people, could do about it…except hope that it will go back to sleep...

I just wish you could be here to see your granddaughter..if just for a second…

I don`t like Novembers, daddy…you died on a cold November day…and I will always worry…when November comes…

Absolutely beautiful. I loved it.

[lilydust76]

Srbo, that was touching, in more ways than one. We've all lost someone, and death is never an easy thing to deal with. I still will have something happen, and reach for the phone to call my grandfather, and remember, again, that he's dead. It hurts, and I don't think it ever stops, maybe just gets a bit more manageable over time.
My thought and prayers are with you.
((((((Srbo))))))

[Srbo]

Thank you, Lilydust and Jay for reading.

[Srbo]

Thank you for the link Srbo. :smile2:


Volic, my dear, you never told me what you thought of the movie...

[tillyn]

Thank you for sharing.

[Srbo]

Thank you so much for reading, Lucy.

It still breaks my heart...this is the one that a human being can`t ever forget...or even stop thinking about if even for just a litlle while...:sad:

[smooth operator]

Oh Srbo, I'm sending hugs. :(

Me too. Great big ones.

[Chelle71]

Wow that was beautiful...

[AngelZ]

Srbo -- sending out a hug...