The One Constant In Life...Change

**Christopher** · February 5th, 2013

Thanks again, much, for the kind words and support. It means very much to me, and also to Ivan, when I told him of it.
He has had both of the biopsies, lung and bone, and will be going into Atlanta tomorrow to discuss treatment options. He has said to me that he will likely not do chemo, as it treats one and not the other, so what's the point. I agree with him on that. But he has asked me to do something for him when the time comes. Compassionate Release. I agree with it in theory, but it is much harder when it is someone close to you. I worry about whether I will be strong enough. I have talked with my P.O. He is willing to work with me, and has told me to keep him updated on the situation. That is a big relief. Salamat sa Diyos. We will also be selling the house and moving into Atlanta soon, to be near the hospitals and to his family and friends. In a way, that will be good for me. More people + More computers = More work for me. Sad that it had to come this way, though. Well, back with more soon.

**GNTLGNT** · February 11th, 2013

Compassionate Release

...I understand the meaning of this in Corrections, but are you referring to "assisted suicide" or "pulling the plug" in the crass vernacular?...

**gniknehpets** · February 11th, 2013

Christopher, I am so sorry. Hang in there seems such a silly phrase but it helps me sometimes. One minute at a time, hang in there.

**Lily Sawyer** · February 11th, 2013

Christopher, get in touch with a hospice now. Because it's stage 4 and your partner's opted to not undergo chemo, he'll probably be given pharmaceutical cocktails instead, so when his decline becomes more evident, you're going to need help. (Just saw this online: Compassionate Care Hospice in Atlanta) They will help you emotionally and physically with Ivan, and tell you what to expect, when to expect it, and what you'll need to get through it. I am so sorry this is happening to the two of you. Please know you're both in my thoughts.

**Christopher** · February 11th, 2013

Yes. That is what I refer to. But I am also unsure of the legalities concerning that in Georgia. Especially since I am on felony state probation.

**Christopher** · February 11th, 2013

Thank you. And that is not a silly phrase. At least, I don't think it is. If you really look at it and what it means, it is profound.

**GNTLGNT** · February 12th, 2013

...I a dyed-in-the-wool proponent of leaving life on your own terms...I wish you and your partner all the love and prayers in the world, and hope peace is obtained...

**Spideyman** · February 12th, 2013

Christopher, contact the hospice as Lily suggested. They can answer so many of your questions. Write a list of questions- the compassion they have is great. Continued prayers and thoughts.

**Lily Sawyer** · February 12th, 2013

Originally Posted by GNTLGNT

...I a dyed-in-the-wool proponent of leaving life on your own terms...I wish you and your partner all the love and prayers in the world, and hope peace is obtained...

Me, too. You are both very, very brave.

**Christopher** · April 23rd, 2013

Update = He changed his mind about the chemo after talking again with the doctors at Emory. The first go-round didn't do so well. The lung cancer got a bit better, but the bone cancer got more aggressive and spread. Now cancer is showing up in his kidneys and liver. They changed the chemo to a different set and we'll know in a few weeks if it has done any better. He has completed his Final Directives and etc. We have contacted the hospice to ask preliminary questions. The more involved ones will wait until we move to Atlanta. That will most likely be in June. So far, his decline has been steady but not precipitous, and we are dealing with the changes as they come. A big thing is that many of his friends, recent and long-time, have banded together to visit, help, and support us. As have a few friends I have made. That has done a lot to improve his outlook, and mine. Currently, the house and land are back on the market, and we have arranged a moving sale for May 4th. Then a shop auction for May 16th. We have gotten a lot done so far to be ready for the sale and auction, so that's good. Things are well so far with Probation and Counseling. They have been more flexible and supportive than I thought they would be. That is a big relief. And they said they would help me arrange for transfer so I can remain in compliance. They have also been forgiving of my being behind in monthly payments, to a degree. But I will have to catch up pretty soon.
Well, enough for now. More soon.